Why don't you ever send me any naked pics
at a party and just made O-H-I-O out of dicks and vajayjays...i hope someone took a pic i was too busy (; GO BUCKS!!!
I just saw on the news, this guy tried to smuggle coke in a bouquet of roses... and to think I used to hate valentines day.
I'm taking this break up pretty rough.. I've never been to sad to masturbate.
she's walking down the hall in a thong and one flip flop and one ugg
Last night in my drunkenness I bought hurricane supplies which included a jug of wine and a bouquet of flowers. Apparently I'm going to woo Irene.
There's a questionable stain on Harley's bed...would they have sex on a dog bed?
Keep it up. It gets easier when you turn 21. Something happens in people's brains when they turn 21 and all of a sudden you have the power to drink constantly and abuse drugs and still graduate with good grades and your shit together. Im almost positive I read it in my freshman year bio textbook
He started screaming when he saw my dog. He thought it was a polar bear
I paid your brother in tostitos to drive me home.
I almost got on a bus to Langley Air Force Base. 99% sure that's not where I wanna be.
Imagine Arby's curly fries spiraled around a dick
I'm going to become fluent in fucking Belgian boys
U were so upset when the shower ruined ur nachos. I didn't kno what to do.
Well, I was arguably the most sober adult in the house by 1 in the afternoon, so I'd say Superbowl Shitshow was a success.
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