i just cleaned out my toilet because i knew that my head would be in it later
the last thing i remember is fucking her. GAME CHANGER i woke up in another bedroom to her younger sister blowing me
We tried having a conversation with our noses.
Just passed a strip club with a Marquis sign that said 'tis the squeezin'
I just smoked a bowl while riding a horse. This has been a productive vacation.
and you will have a crown and it will be made of penises and all will bow before you and your glorious penis crown
Petty good. I just stapled a 5 dollar bill onto the chest of a sword swallower.
i now officially have to be stoned in order to look like my passport when i go to a different country
When did angry sex become our thing?
I was a bouncer for about 90 seconds until the real bouncers figured out that I was doing their job
Have you seen him ? Seriously. No one is that straight.
Maybe you can just make seal noises during sex and we can call it good
I fit in backpacks. BOOM HERE I AM! Like a stripper from a cake.
For starters i called the cops on myself for trying to destroy the ladys decorations
You kept on yelling traitor and threatened to kill him and everyone he loves because he played beerpong with someone else
Randomize
