all I remember was being half naked drinking water on my hands and knees from her dogs water bowl.
nothing this campus sells is worth it. not even sex.
you made your cat watch a peta video with you, so you could show it how just how good its life is
Also, just saw a homeless man answer a phone call on a blackberry...
After he came he asked what I was doing for thanksgiving.
i hope someone procrastinates by putting up the pics up...
sarah said she can't even post all of hers due to facebook indecency rules
We just for robbed for the second time. I believe the only thing I have left to my name is my $75 dildo
Sign she's a keeper: "I would rather be late to brunch than waste a perfectly good boner."
he puked in the sink and didnt turn off the water before he passed out on the bathroom floor. its been 2 hrs and we finally noticed that the whole fucking house is flooded. to hell with this birthday party
50% drunk capacity currently
my biography would be titled "haunting truths and dick jokes: a tale of love, loss, and masturbation."
He told me that if he broke my bed my bed durring sex he would take me to ikea, but only on Monday because it's all you can eat meatballs. I think I'm in love.
Its my nipple ring piercing anniversary. We need to celebrate.
Dude get over here. Steven brought super soakers filled with colored vodka.
So I had this brilliant idea that I would sleep in all sorts of sweatpants and sweatshirts... Apparently I thought I could "sweat" off the drunk in my sleep and that it would make me feel better when I woke up
Randomize
