As heartfelt as your proposal was- I will NOT marry for money- especially to someone who still owes me $700. You r officially pathetic!!
if only i could text you this smell
i think im having one of those erections lasting four or more hours
Two grown ass men just come into the bar riding humongous tricyles
In all fairness I didnt see your dick because it was already in her
Just saw the guy with the plastic bag on his head riding his bike again...
If I were you I'd use my green card to do more coke and less talking
yes i am an adult who snuck out of my parents house to cuddle with a guy and then came home and listened to taylor swift. judge me all you want.
I'm rearranging all my life goals to become a billionaire by 28 and batman by 30. Not kidding.
Remember, ur body isn't a visitors center
SOMEONE WITH THE TWITTER HANDLE "METHLAB" FAVORITED THAT PICTURE
steve's beating me 4-2 in our "sexually confusing straight people" competition. steve is a wizard. this is not a drill.
you said "it's karaoke night" and tried to use my dick as a microphone
How's moving going?
Uh, we're on the way to the store to buy more booze
If you’re wondering why the bong is outside the garage door just know I was being environmentally efficient by not using the freezer to chill my shit
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