Eric got herpes from Jo-ann
That's what he deserves for hooking up with a french canadian
she said "feliz nobby job" then proceeded to give me a blowjob.
We need to start having rules for the weekends. Like no more downing 3 shots because we want to slut dance a little harder or because biggie just came on.
just masturbated through my pocket at the library. hope you're enjoying your saturday night out.
I mean can we take a second to high five on our sex life? I love us.
Just woke up. Need to shower and fuck. Be there when I'm done disappointing. Should be 30.
I could write a book on how to barely get by in community college. I just took an online quiz on my phone, at the bar, 6 minutes before it was due.
I'm trying to have a "pick me up from my house so I can get completely annihilated night" any takers? Cmon people this is what friends are for
I used to be terrified of what was under your bed until I passed out there last night. Now it just feels like home.
When were you at my house?
Would you even take no as an answer? I have a feeling you see it more as a challenge.
Dear Jesus. Send me strength to not suck cock this morning.
I tried to celebrate Halloween, Thanksgiving, Hannukah, and New Years all in one night.
I know but we're going to blackout city so it'll probably be warm there
How ya feelin' champ?
Like a million bucks that was soaked in alcohol.
There's wine in the fridge here. You could leave school and we could get day drunk.
That's my favorite drunk.
Randomize
