oh my god I didn't know your sister was this good at french kissing
I skipped class, don't know why though bc all I did in the meantime was cook pancakes and watch infomercials..my life sucks
When did we start counting Thursdays as weekends?
When we got our fake ids in grade 11, why?
I just feel like it's time to start counting wednesdays as well...
it only took me 1 hour to write 8 pages. i'm never doing school work without adderall ever again.
We did lines off of a Whitney Houston CD case. That makes everything okay.
Home safe. Psyche shattered. Still rolling. In love with the morrocan rug in the living room.
Do you know anything about the Easter basket sitting on my doorstep filled with porn and peeps?
I have an odd instinct I wont find my underwear tonight
I'm in a pile of cheezits at an unfamiliar location watching dateline on tlc. Stage an intervention.
I have a rage boner right now. An actual erection brought on by the amount of sheer hatred I have towards nationwide.
What made you think singing Silent Night while I was puking was a good idea?!?!
im about to go through the checkout with 3 flasks and a wedding card. let the judgement begin!
update: cashier guessed cash bar before i could say anything. completely bypassed "dry" and knew cash bar right away. i love this state.
So I'm never gonna get to see you again?
Hopefully.
i'm extremely hungover on the ski bus and the driver is playing abba. this. is. not. okay.
i just woke up in my dog's bed, on my parents floor, my outfit on backwards, and a bottle of lube poured down my pocket.
Randomize
