): 100 percent naked, unless you count a tiara as clothing.
I decided you couldn't drive after you asked where the time circuits were on your Altima
I wanted to see November 5, 1985
I'm 99% sure that for 3 hours I thought you were British. We must smoke that again.
i want to have as much fun as i did last weekend. but plus the condom and minus the fear.
sent the pic of my tit to the wrong bbm chatroom
I love Japanese schoolgirls with short skirts riding bikes on windy days.
You're never coming back, are you?
a commercial for my antidepressant came on and they said you shouldn't take if if you drink right as i took a shot
god is laughing at you again
what's with the bloody hand print on the hood of your car
I have got to stop assigning last names to girls I get numbers from based on what I think will remind me of them... Sarah Petrydish is not an acceptable memory trigger
Hi Jessica this is Jessica and I am texting you and were taking lime shots and it's fantastic and I broke your elbow and I love you xo
Cracked my iPhone screen. Real bad. Girl from last night isn't ugly yet. Stop me if you still think she belongs under a bridge. You have 12 seconds.
the fat guy in me is very excited, and the skinny guy in me is very excited for the fat guy in me
You meet the best people naked in a hot tub at 2 am.
When I woke up next to him on the living room floor, my glasses were broken and it felt like someone rubbed a cactus all over my vag
you're the only girl i know who can be too sick to walk to the kitchen and still have enough game to receive multiple orgasms
Randomize
