hey can you give me head? jesse told me that you're really good
who is this?
jesse's little brother
neither the pictures you took nor my hangover explain why there are skittles in my shoe
ironically, his detergent was also "small and mighty"
Fuck buddy has no power. Invited her over to use my shower. I love hurricaines.
1 I really miss college walks of shame 2 I think I may have killed this girls cat
I think I suffocated him while I was riding his face
You rode him down the last flight of stairs like a human sled.
On that note I give you a 10 for sticking the landing and staying on the whole ride.
Want to get high and go thrifting? I'm trying to succeed making my dorm look like a deranged Applebees.
She who has the vag holds all the power. He will learn one way or the other.
Fucking holidays. How do I have this many men who want to fuck me and none of them are available when I'm ready to blow my top?
I just had a sex dream about orange juice, so there's that.
You know you're gay when you have to have your coworkers explain to you why your bracket is terrible
He brought over a bottle of tequila and a box of donuts with the Plan B, so I guess you could say things are getting pretty serious.
Tinder recommend to a friend: making threesomes easier since 2016
I just saw a guy in a zippo shirt buy 2 gallons of fire starter fluid and then proceed to smoke a cigarette. I feel like hes got some big plans for his tuesday.
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