Do you ever creep on the girls you have banged and wondered how their walk of shame went?
this girl and her friend just showed up at my house. standing together, theylook exactly like the number 10. this has cockblock written alllllll over it.
I guess there's some 16 and under softball tournament and they all are at my work. what is a 21 year old to do?
The responsible thing...show them the break room.
You said eat breakfast. So i poured Baileys on top of m&m's. It taste just like like cereal I swear.
She's pathetic and vulnerable..and short. Thats his type.
I don't think there was a moment this weekend where grey goose did not course through my veins
I have a test in the morning in sign language about signs for drugs and alcohol use. Im drunk and rolling a blunt. I've never felt so confident about a grade in my life.
I come bearing gifts of whiskey and vagina
There is booty call etiquette, and he just isn't following it. I'm not making you breakfast, gtfo.
Last I saw, they went for a smoke and only one came back. He passed out outside. I'm glad he's only 120lbs. I left him on the rug still. My mom is gonna be pissed.
I'm cleaning my apartment while naked. Anyone who says that's not why they want to live on their own is lying.
That sounds worse than that time you thought out an entire story of how big bird would kill you
Cancelling your gym membership calls for alcohol.
I just found out how I got home last night. The bartenders found me sitting in the brush peeing and called me a cab. Have you seen my underwear?
I woke up spooning with two strangers on Saturday morning... I felt like a sexual sandwich
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