it was like playing where's waldo with your underwear
I am at the gas station and there is a whole amish family here I'm not sure why the amish need gas but I think its worth investigating
Whoever said drinking more helps a hangover didn't drink 96% of a fifth of whiskey last night. This is absurd.
i cant remember past the part when we filled his tub with skittles.
I called him daddy. To his face. Somewhat sober. What more could I do?
Theyll love you, its bunch of older ladies who drink whisky and sours and talk about the sex seans in Game of Throwns
BTW, Julia referred to you as a power bottom. Are you available?
He walked in on me banging his sister and said "you're both old enough to make you own decisions. Carry on"
So you called me the queen of nudes yesterday and I'm still not sure how I feel about it
whenever i get involved w someone i'm gonna give you their number to testify to the fact that they should not fall in love with me
Why do I have this feeling like this is heading in a slightly threesome-y direction
is it bad that I see hot guys I wanna sleep with as challenges instead of actual people?
yes. but it works for you
They made me leave the maternity ward, how do I get back in?
How high?! We watched paid programming for 45 minutes before we realized it wasn't just a long commercial. So pretty high. The Bionic fish finder looks promising, though.
Lets get a boat first.
Don't mind me, I'm just walking 2 miles across campus with no jacket, covered in highlighter, and carrying a hair extension. Gotta love miami!
Randomize