you dont know how to answer ppls txts anymore?!?
im sorry, i don't get text messages.
So today I found out that our school is known as the herpes school
Fucking Canada. At least when they wake up tomorrow they're still in Canada
I found him crying and drunk, in my closet holding a picture of Tyler Perry. He managed to say"he's just so many people"
Then he said something about how from that angle I looked just like his mom.
knew it was a bad idea. the look she gave me when i left her roommates bedroom in the morning really illustrated that.
please promise me that no matter what happens you will keep me away from the children
I don't want to be with anyone who doesn't accept me for who I am. eating cheeseburgers in bed is my favorite activity.
BTW the amount of schmoozing I am doing towards some guy for an ID that may or may not look like you... You better love me.
And then he said he would build me a mountain dew water fountain
Marry him now.
Okay. So I've done lines off a bible. But that's just for the sake of being cliché.
You are driving me to get new toys, i am test driving them on the way home.
We are taking your truck.
If you had amazing eyebrows i'd have sex with them.
Tinder date just called. I was supposed to be there 30 minutes ago but I'm on a 27 game win streak in Park...?
Fuck that man! Tell her your dog died or something. Reschedule that shit, you can't stop 2K at a time like that. Ball is life bro... Priorities.
I've seen you go skiing on a Tuesday, but you think you're too good for TGI Friday's?
Randomize
