oh no you fucking didn't eat my mac and cheese you cunt
He has a tattoo of a carebear. This is not happening.
I am moving slowly w him. I havent even masturbated to him yet.
Help. Me. He just whispered 'prepare yourself', & sprayed hairspray everywheres to make sure the 'air was crisp'
We just shotgunned beers for America
I found a ladder. I don't know where I am. Gonna climb it. I feel like aladin
I will come over now to take full advantage of you in your vulnerable state.
Fine. I should warn you I just threw up in danas fish tank. Fish are dead. Livers dead. I smell and look like a dead animal. And not showering. So deal with it.
I just woke up and my mouth tastes like I licked the bathroom floor in the last ghetto bar we were in. I'm going to get my mouth checked for chlamydia. Do I see a dentist for that?
I just remember being in the bathroom alone cussing out the bunny
New carpet is nice. I'm making carpet angels. Like a fresh snowfall.
That is cause you are some weird type of mutant that lives off of Alcohol.
HE FINALLY TEXT ME AND CALLED ME BY MY TWITTER NAME STAND BY FOR THE WEDDING INVITE, BRIDESMAID
He's like a unicorn and I just wanna domesticate him
Please send pictures of any nice new years ladies you run across in town, as I've forgotten what women look like.
Just let me suck your dick and be happy. Let me have this.
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