Go to google and type XXX
.......Is that how you look for porn?
so on my way home this naked dude runs right in front me his weiner at half mast screaming i'm only doing this cause its a 50 dollar dare
you kept talking about how hot andy milinakis is and the things you would do with him. no more tequila from him.
Who was that guy I met at your brother's house who had to get stitches in his ass?
Last time I stayed at my moms my fucking car got set on fire sooo maybe I should think this through.
Did you ever stop and think that god invented whiskey dick specifically for me
No. I just want to cuddle and talk about our feeling. Of course this a booty call.
ALWAYS CAPS LOCK. IS THERE EVER A SITUATION THAT DOES NOT CALL FOR CAPS LOCK? NO.
Sexting? Sexting in caps lock seems rather unnerving.
I WANT YOUR BODY AND I WANT IT NOW.
I rest my case.
i just had to pick up my 18 year old cousin from the police station for hosting a party, and i had to do this stoned wow
He kept asking for nudes so I sent him a picture another guys dick. He called me ruthless.
I think curling is the best thing to watch when you're baked.
Let's celebrate that I used a condom
One of your snapchats was of you with a 40oz of Mickeys and the caption: "Deep Throat back in her natural habitat"
You were taking in your sleep. You were like Jess that's that animal we were talking about and you Hugged her feet
I feel like I should treat myself every time I find out I'm not pregnant. Is there a pie company that delivers??
Randomize
