She has a t-rex face on a stuart little body.
He quoted an N'sync song to confess his attraction to me. Needless to say, I had sex with him.
I saw him at work today and he gave me a really awkward "I know what you do drunk" look...
just had a dream there were parent teacher conferences in college...scariest dream ever.
I'm wearing the bright blue sombrero all through the airport as a sign of triumph that I survived spring break. I'm getting compliments
I passed out and woke up with my pockets full of Lucky Charms cereal and chocolate coins. Another successful St Pattys Day.
He got tattooed, peirced, and we're pretty sure he got rufeed by that fat chick. He was like a walking spring break stereotype.
You crawled everywhere and rolled in ice cream. No more vodka for a month.
don't say the first was when I crawled under into the dressing room
dude, you were feeling up her boob for 20 minutes in front of the guy she was hitting on because you and her had an argument over who had bigger boobs.
hey man, it was for science okay.
the manly guy you want to date so badly? he's at the club. as a drag queen. wearing higher heels than you own. think about that.
Anyway. I unfriended all of these people like a grown up and I am never talking to them again
I hooked up with a sophomore, passed out at midnight, and apparently drunkenly peed on Nicole's wedding invitation
I just put my eye make up on in the bathroom of the bar.... I may be too comfortable here....
i realized my signature handshake has now become a hookup. i love what college has done to me.
Randomize
