So how was he last night?
Five-minute foot-long.
She was singing my heart will go on into her barf bag. celine aint got shit on her.
I just took a shit in a BP station. It seemed appropriate since they are shtting in our ocean.
i dont know, i woke up and he was going down on me. i guess i can save his number
I want to start this convo out by apologizing for the broken toaster.
A man in denim coveralls just shotgunned a beer on the dance floor
I remember all the people and all the acts I just have to match the person with the act
diet's not working. come over. i need someone to fuck the hungry out of me.
Hey, met you at the bar last night. You probably dont remember my name. You and your friends came back to my place, you shattered my window with your fist then dipped. Your gonna need to pay for that.
Thats where this cut came from! Thanks for piecing together the puzzle dude.
He ripped down his Kate Upton poster while we were having sex last night. Im gonna take that as a good sign.
Basically I will actually need a reindeer pulled sleigh to make it to all the penises in one night.
He told us a story about a time his 80 year old uncle karate chopped a dick in a glory hole.
so we just got back from swapping peoples patio furniture around to different patios. some people might like unexpected change. others might regret living on the ground floor.
I just found a ladybug shell in my underwear. What was I doing last night?
You're going to literally shit your fucking unholy pants when Jesus rides in with his dual light-sabers on his velociraptor and cleaves you in half.
Randomize
