For what it's worth, your chances of anal go up the more she loves you. There's always a silver lining.
I will also inform you that stairs change when you change a house. Those hurt.
Tonight's Jeopardy categories were "Star Trek, Action Figures, Dinner For One, In Need of a Date, Still Living With Mom & Dad, You Have No Life." Beginning to think my life is the Truman Show.
I feel like I had a lobotomy last night. I blacked out. Did we try to stick my Penis in a beer bottle?
Just saw two dudes run across the street carrying a mini keg and a scaled model of the empire state building. Missed this town
It's like I opened a door and behind it lay mythical creatures sprinklin fairy dust upon the land leading me to a pot of gold. And that gold is some delicious cock.
Look bro I'll go half per boob with you, we split her.
I left the bar I'm on a bench across from the bowling alley taking a nap please come get me. I've had three lollipops.
You was so high that you insisted that you heard someone whistle, then you insisted they was trapped in the wall!
He took my necklace off while we were 69ing. His tongue never stopped moving either. Take that, guys who can't figure out how bras work.
I met someone else! And I had a wonderful orgasm! And he wants to see me again, like take me out!
I think vodka/water/skittles totally beats your crystal light mimosas
Glitter fights sound a lot funner in theory.
I told him I wanted to get on him and ride him to Montana. It didnt end like i thought it would.
I was at his place until 2am. We just sat really close an stared at each other. I think you are right. Germans must not have feelings. Not even tingly ones in their pants.
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