Girl in front of me has spent the class alternating between playing farmville and the tiffany's website looking at engagement rings. Every once in a while she holds her hand up to the screen.
She doesn't deserve the breathe the same air that we do.
She just bought a cow and we've moved on to looking at wedding dresses.
So, I had a dream last night that girls approached guys at the bar and said things like "i would like to pleasure you tonight." No drink buying, no sweet talking or ANYTHING.....it. was. awesome.
About to fuck some random fraternity guy I met at a party. I guess this would be the right time to say I don't want to be with you anymore.
he turned two sober chicks into 7 drunken girls...he's my hero
Well, she's officially disappointed in me. I have it writing.
And I don't know what it is about weed making me want every episode of the real housewives of everywhere
Every pair of shorts I try on makes me look like some kind of powerful lesbian wizard.
That is like, the point of shorts
He just tried to eat my hair and he keeps talking about pissing on everything, come home soon I beg of you
I don't remember but we shouldn't have a problem. Unless drunk you encouraged drunk me not to wear a condom.
I think we have a problem.
In the store looking for it now. They put the theatre/script section right next to the gay erotica section. Rude. Practical, but rude.
He is so pussy whipped she has made him change his name to Toby
I might attempt to pee into a cup while driving. I'll let you know how it goes.
I ain't lettin her quit anyway. We don't fuck enough for her to meet the housewife requirements
We go out and drink, fuck, and I stay the night. He agrees to it because he knows I'll hook him up to IV fluids in the morning. Everyone wins
I blacked out and when I woke up and looked at the counter.. there was a full cake upside down. I dont even understand ...
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