If I see one more commercial for The Secret Life of the American Teenager, I'm going to punch the next teenage girl I see in the uterus and scream, "Wear a condom!"
she looks like someone took a bunch of spare parts and glued them all on one face. it's quite horrifying.
He has jerked off in so many socks I am surprised he doesn't have athletes dick
You act like I was drinking alone...I had the entire Verizon network with me
operation have a gay friend backfired
I had it in my eyebrows, my bangs, under one eye, and across both cheeks. Congratulations on the successful and elusive warpaint cumshot.
Trying to ignore the fact that a kid I hooked up with twice just gave me spare keys to his house ... and car.
We were having sex in the gardens when the grounds keeper walked up on us. He gave me a thumbs up and walked away
He stumbled in drunk at 7am, while we were getting ready for work. He poured a bowl of Cap'n Crunch, poured Jack Daniels on it., and said he was having "Captain Jack" for breakfast. I don't know how he's alive and employed. I hope the Cap'n calls in sick for him today.
I feel like one thing if I have going for me is that my bed looks like a nice place to have sex
My dick has a subreddit
I'm prostituting myself for tickets to Disney World. There's a contradiction there.
I would be down to associate sex w taco bell
I have a completly random but serious question. Can I make a paper mache mold of you ass and turn it into a pinata filled with airplane bottles of liquor? Its for my art class
Don't come in. My door to my bathroom won't close because of the table and I'm pooping
Classy
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