when you find your car can you pick me up? his mom is here and im hungover
we made out on top of his cat.
She was so drunk that I kept trying to switch out her wine for water. Sort of like Jesus, but in reverse.
I was speaking french the whole night. Until i got arrested. Then I decided I should probably start speaking English.
In The Air Tonight was playing in the dentist's office. Had to stop the cleaner to do the drums.
She told me she was going to ride me so hard i would cum the ghosts of my ancestors...its gonna be a good time
WHAT KIND OF DUMPSTER DOESNT HAVE PIZZA IN IT?
NO. ANAL IS NOT A GAME.
Exactly, there's no such thing as commitment at foam n' glow
im sleeping with a therapist...so you can talk to me.
By the way anyone who is willing to be in the film while tripping gets free shrooms.
the amount of times i have been intoxicated, barefoot, and in a robe at 3 am at the quick check by your house is impressive, especially since i live an hour away
Happy anniversary, did you sign and mail in the divorce papers yet?
I knew you were on something when you said you were a puppy and you ate all the frosty Paws dog ice cream which says not for human consumption right on the side of it.
my favorite part was when you kept waving @ that guy and insisiting it was your cousin..and it wasnt and wondering why he wasnt waving back lol you were legit PISSED
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