the only reason why im excited to go home for break is to finally eat real fucking food and have normal bowel movements.
I just got off a plane from Mexico. At least 15 passengers dashed to the bathroom throughout the flight. Can you tell its spring break?
So bad news they put a private property sign on the tiger.
Until they install cameras or armed security i'll ride the fuck out of that jungle cat.
I feel like I would bang a guy with a dick piercing just to say I have...like climbing a huge mountain or somethig
He is the Donovan McNabb of stuff up his ass. Tell me that tomorrow. Too high to remember.
I feel uncockblockable...banged her in the bathroom with my iv still in
Lesson of the night: never take shots out of a bottle you found under a couch in a frat house. I have no idea where I am
It mathmatically balances. Less pants + more shirt = fully clothed. see? Not a whore!
okay - we take $20 and buy each other some 'drink till we puke' clothes from the thrift store.
If fixing it is ignoring it, and getting naked. Then yes we fixed it.
I also just stashed a half dozen bobby pins in my bra.... So when you take it off later, consider yourself warned
What're you gonna do with the rest of your night?
Probably watching cooking videos and fantasizing about pie
He just made this face while he was fucking me and he looked like the hunchback of Notre Dame, I had to stop him.
I'm ne vrr drinkjng againnnnnnnn dforeal.
He stopped mid sex to say he was sorry that he couldn't make us work.continued. Stopped again to ask if it was crazy that he loved me.
That is not what no strings attached sex is about.
Randomize
