i finally watched harry potter... a tad unrealistic if you ask me... i mean a ginger kid with 2 friends?
it's a simple rule - pass out shirtless on the couch, become an airsoft target.
Can I just say that you're probably one of my favorite people to have sex with and then eat hummus with at 3:45am?
Quote of the night award goes to my father "I like wearing my swim trunks around the house because they are cooler and more blousy for my balls". Yay dad
woke up in a random sweater in a random bed in a random house on a street I don't recognize..
also, I vaguely remember swapping shirts with some random guy on the dance floor.
I think your dad took our porno
I mean, with your nipple problem im surprised. #hangacoatonem
Just had to kick my 26 yr old boyfriend out of my bed before getting the kids up for school. Have I mentioned being 41 doesn't suck as much as all the hype.
The only way I'll cross anything off my to do list today is if I write 'eat melted cheese' on it
I feel like one thing if I have going for me is that my bed looks like a nice place to have sex
I have a tattoo that says Yolo. You should not have been asking my advice in the first place
In going to go underground and live with the mole people for a while.
All I did was call him a fucker when he took my pot. He didn't have to arrest me.
Let's just say that I took off my pants and I had superman boxers on. Then she took off her pants and she had batman panties on. I think she's the one!
Parade of Dicks...that's what I'm calling 2017
Randomize
