I want to kish your cheek
My cheeks are in Michigan
Oh my lips are kind of stretchy
Just lit a joint with steel wool and a 9 volt battery... thank you 3rd grade science class
im kinda looking forward to winter break. ive been away from home for so long i think i can trick my vagina into thinking that these arent the same people ive been hooking up with since high school...
my stepmom is let-the-dog-eat-out-of-her-mouth drunk. oh my god.
fat chick, vomit on the dog, and three unidentifiable pills in my ear. all in the same ear. what the hell happened after the guests showed up?
Just did an entire nights worth of bar crawl in an hour. Boom
Let's get weird.
It's 10 am...
I'm assuming that means you're not busy...
It is no longer St. Patrick's Day. I should NOT still have green boobs!
You can't just take out your bong for hits in public places... That's what pipes are for. You've got to be stealthier.
No, it's okay because this is the city of trees.
YOU'VE ALREADY BEEN BUSTED MORE THAN ONCE. THAT'S NOT A VALID EXCUSE FOR BONG HITS IN COFFEE GARDEN
I round house kicked her emotions in the face
He brought over a bottle of tequila and a box of donuts with the Plan B, so I guess you could say things are getting pretty serious.
OMFG I JUST SEARCHED DILDO ON THE WORK SHARED AMAZON ACCOUNT!!!!!
i had to flash a cab last night.
did it work?
No. he slowed down but then kept going. story of my life.
He's petting your head, we need to leave now.
It’s a prereq for med school, so I hope the professor likes blow jobs
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