playing new game: drink everytime u see someone at the beach with a tramp stamp, double if u guess it before u see it, triple for male tramp stamps
warning: blackouts possible when playing in ocean city or anywhere in new jersey
Why must guys tell girls who are a little bigger that "they like a girl with meat on her bones?" Yeah needless to say he went home alone
I wishh there was a lost and high section in walmart cause I would be there right now
Whoa, Gary Coleman died
Whatchu talkin bout?!?!
Too soon.
Always thought my first night in jail would consist of fire and a bunny suit.
Ever had blood in your semen? I am guessing that's a problem.
First and foremost she's my friend, but she's also a mistake I make when I'm drunk
Remember when we pinky swore we'd never feel hungover alone...
Had mirculous sex while watching miracle. Until she got mad that I kept quoting the movie. Not my fault I'm a good multi-tasker
Do you believe in miracles?
At our floor meeting the RA was talking about bathroom hygiene and I really wanted to be like "what about shower sex."
Valid question
I'll be there in spirit. Right there in your vagina.
The window painters skipped us. They didn't know what to do with the giant SMOKE WEED in the window. So they just skipped it.
The only reason I have clothes in my overnight bag is to cover up my sex toys.
He caught me shoving meatballs into my mouth using my hand. Fuck utensils. It’s Christmas...and this is why I’m single.
They are good meatballs.
Gameplan: If the cops show up, find a potted plant to hide behind... It's worked before!
Randomize
