You should get sea herpes
I mean sea horses
i think the cat found all the blow we lost...
it's like your virginity...sometimes you have to pretend like it's still there
What's the kids name that was drinking stale beer and redbull out of the blender?
We need to buy some popsicles so we can remind ourselves we're good at this.
Aw c'mon. You have to see if the spinning penis rumor is true.
Do you remember unrolling paper towels as a blanket?
I've started making all these amazing things...like bananas rolled in doritos..bandritos.
One good thing out of all this is her ass is huge. Like Australia Big.
Like he and the nurses kept being so persistent with it and I just wanted to run out of there in my backless gown and yell FUCK OFF BITCHES IM OUT
ok now I feel liek a very drunk human instead of a chaos being thanks water
We're gonna have to check the security cameras after last night
I'm sorry that you wanted to get laid and I all I did was play with your new cat instead.
Omg I should get on tinder just to get some edibles in town
Did you finish that presentation yet?
No but don’t worry about it. I do my best work in the middle of the night. I’m like a hamster.
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