This is evicking siegelnvs
Im sorry?
This is fucking ridiculous*
Sandwiches eeeeeeverywhere.
If we don't get kicked out of this hotel tonight for fucking too loud we're breaking up
Is YOLO really just a socially acceptable way to say you enjoy putting things up your nose?
When you mimic motorboating Jennifer Love Hewitt, is it really that hard to understand why no one thinks you're straight?
How do I feel about a girl who has a g string tattooed on
I'm hoping my engineering degree will pay off when I invent porn watching in the shower
1) I'm a decent drunk texter. 2) My world is spinning. 3) I'll give you a dollar and a hug for a glass of water. 4) I love you. 5) Example: your penatrive ways are overwhelming my alternative lyfestyle. 6) That is all.
7) Noodle arms: engage
The example was me just using big words while hammered. You're welcome. Ambidextrious. I spelled it right.
I SMOKED SO MUCH I SKIPPED A DAY.
It's gay pride, I'm in my EMT uniform getting more girls than your straight ass ever will..
Well sure, my hetero side is thrilled, but my gay side is soooo judging
Can't feel body but making pizza rolls
He took my Spanx off and still fucked me twice. I call that success.
You should of known that i was high if i refer to myself as melting into anything
He made a group chat with him, his wife, & I. Is this really life!??
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