Is it morally objectionable to repay my debt to society with drug money?
Dude she let me cum on her face
You have the wrong number I'm the she who let you cum on her face unless some other girl has let you since this morning
i'm sitting in the pool eating chicken pot pie with my little brother's friend. moments like these are the reason i love weed.
Just saw a woman walking a golden retriever and a vacuum down the road. I miss downtown.
don't forget friday is see who can get the most free drinks at the gay bar contest. winner gets $50
your love of good penises attached to ugly faces is disgusting and slightly disturbing.
I'm at the bar alone. Is this how you feel?
dreams really do come true on the roof and drinking again
You know it's bad when I can already feel tomorrow's hangover before even drinking today.
BURNT NIPPLES ARE UNHAPPY NIPPLES.
Some people dream of being astronauts others dream of having genitalia that shines like Edward Cullen in the sun
Just want to apologize again for asking to spot your form in the shower.
Drunk me just want to text sober me for saving that half rack of ribs I loves you
At least get laid and waffle fries out of it you whipped basterd
This is either going to be a hilarious catfish or the fuck trophy of the century.
Randomize
