I want to do you till i cant cum anymore. Till all i get is a little flag that says "bang".
he's been in the country 4 hours and we just did it in the closet. he called me "miss flirtatious in the cupboard." i'm in love.
I just used 'come play with my balls' as a legitimate booty call attempt. And it worked.
Shotgunned a beer while taking a bath.
It's been decided..lingerie is an investment. You get free breakfast and cab rides out of it.
i just woke up reverse cowgirl on my couch. fully clothed. my laptop is on the floor sideways. blasting gay porn and lady gaga. pizza crust everywhere. goodmorning.
got high to the hills theme song. FEEL THE RAIN ON YOUR SKIN. no regrets.
I mean i can't really be mad...either way i was gonna fuck him or hate fuck him, so it's basically a win/win situation.
If he's the sort of guy that will fuck in a public restroom, he's the sort of guy that will cheat on his gf. I'm goin for it.
You invited the cop in for a "Celebrity shot"
You realize that if you get murdered while we're talking, I'm gonna have to explain to your next of kin why the last thing on your phone is a picture of my boobs.
Side note, i did some manscaping and now my farts sound way different
She shoved her hand down my pants and held my cock for thirty minutes in the bar. It was like she was letting all the other females know I was hers.
It's brunch. If you find dick at brunch. You an A+ hoe.
if having to see my ex’s dick once in a while is the price I pay to the universe for making my life go a little smoother, I’ll take it
Randomize
