Luol and I just scored with two 40 year old married chicks. They dropped us off on the way to soccer prctic. The kids in the back were confused. Call me.
I just got a ticket for shitting on a sand dune.
only if we run a train.
done.
I was actually kinda bummed my STD test came back negative.
That would have been proof he'd slept with the stripper. Lame.
even my farts smell like vagina
we took turns throwing up in the kitchen sink last night...no i am not doing the dishes
I'm shutting down my vagina temporarily...it's like the last two weeks were a going out of business sale...and now it needs a break...
he payed over $300 just to break into the hotel pool and skinny dip alone for 5 minutes and then peace in a cab. and all he had to say for himself was "gotta go swimming, gotta live life"
where do u find these people!?
I'm taking a dab in mourning of how long its been since I smoked with you guys.
I'm crying and shaving my Bronco playoff beard
Herpes is not a lady problem you can solve with shower beers and kissing boys
sorry for running off in the middle of that heart to heart. free food.
She's not answering my calls
Well it sounds like you really fucked up
WHO HOLDS A GRUDGE OVER MEMES
It took him 15 minutes to put the condom on.
The weekend was a blur. There was vodka and penises and orgasms. I played a game of Cock Roulette and won big
Randomize
