Where you at
assisting at a photo shoot in williamsburg till 7ish. wassup?
Doesn't matter. I already jerked off in your bed.
Grab the Coors Light. Its time to get NASCAR drunk
I've officially moved beyond college drinking. I just got business drunk at an internship seminar.
By the end of the night i was making legitimate noises not just saying moo.
all I heard when I woke up this morning was "BONG HITS FOR BREAKFAST" being yelled repeatedly.
I think ppl see us as an unstoppable drunken force
My dog just threw up a condom. Sorry for accusing you of not wearing one, I found it now.
She gives the worst handjobs, it was like raw meat on a cheese grater
We shot off some fireworks at 12 and then I orchestrated the group singing of god bless the USA all while wearing a don't tread on me flag as a cape. I repped hard.
If the egyptians can build pryamids men can walk on the moon and ron jeremy can sleep with all those bitches then we can finish these three handles of vodka
This is the drunkest I've ever been at a chili's
saw a dude wearin soccer cleats at the bar tonight. fuckin kiddin me man?
I'm really ok with inappropriate relationships. They are my favorite of all the relationships. No need to be timid. For crying out loud.
Well waking up naked, covered in Chex mix is not how I planned to start my Wednesday if that's what you're getting at.
Hey can you send me a pic of your breast with a peace sign in the photo? I'm trying to win a scavenger hunt contest. Thanks so much
Randomize
