Oh. He liked you.
Then you said "Are you asian?, I didn't know there was Asians in Colorado."
shes still asleep dad put a lobster in her bathroom
If the blowjob was before the wedding, we're not technically related, right?
I have never made a good decision in that bathroom...
Yo. I have a shitload of cardboard. We have to build a smoke hut in the smoke room with a tunnel connected to a cat house. This way the kitty can join us whenever she pleases
just got in my apt...and theres jungle juice here i left from over a month ago..this could be interesting...or deadly
There's a mouse. In the house. By the cans. With some pans. Release the cat. To eat his hat. Sorry about the mess. Of my breakfest.
No but seriously, there's a fucking mouse in the house by the beer cans
Trust me. I don't get home before 5am. I know what Immmm doing. BTW bail money is in my closet. PEACE
Drunk me obviously wants to fuck up my life
It's like I have an arch nemesis, and it's me
I just had some kinky fun in the back seat of my car behind a Ralph's in south county. How's your thanksgiving eve?
I have never encountered a chode in the wild
I came over to get dick...not to watch you vacuum....at 2 AM
Hey, I'm just seeing how you're doing and letting you know I fucked your dad last night. Don't fuck with me.
lol show me an arrest record and I'll drop my panties
I let a 30 year old guitar player that works at a call center go down on me in his backseat last night
Randomize