we were exchanging secrets last night... she told me about how she put markers in her vaj in middle school. found a keeper.
just did the walk of shame by his grandma. what the fuck is an old lady doing up at six am?
From now on, just let me go home. I'm tired of hooking up with your roommates... Including you.
i have only one word for you: 3somewithnorwegiangirls
I'd really appreciate it if we could dress up as pilgrims and indians for the thanksgiving eve bar crawl
Oh, and no balcony sex...trust me.
when i tried to put the condom on he started screaming about how he didn't want his groceries bagged
you dragged me by my throat over to the shots. this is a new level of alcoholism..
lol i'm looking through my photos and there's this giant section of just dudes wearing murses
I just showered sitting down with a sippy cup of water in there with me. It took 40 minutes. That hungover.
I have a weapon and I'm not blacked out. Good as gold
I feel like telling him your vigina was older than him was not a good pick up line.
hey the jello shots wont freeze
How much Everclear did you put in them?
uhhh all of it
There's no discreet way to sneak a cucumber into the shower lol
OMG OMG OMG I just throwed up in his pillow case when he wentto start the sho wer, time to grab my bra and bounce!!!
Wow.
Randomize
