Dude, she knew her leg was on fire and she kept dancing. Bad-fucking-ass.
I just saw him at the bookstore and all I could think about was him licking your ass
Look, we all have our slutty phases. Mine is just forever.
Was that not clear on Friday when I nearly deapthroated two ice cubes?
im really going to miss that car, so many blow jobs...
literally hosing herself off in my back yard with the hose. i offered her the shower but she refused. that drunk.
i just sent him like 8 different sexts and he texted me back about how good the hummus is that i left in his fridge.
you have no idea the dirty thing i want to do to your blad spot. please wear my vagina as a hat.
Yikes. I usually have a 24-hour waiting period between sex partners. You know, like for a handgun.
It mathmatically balances. Less pants + more shirt = fully clothed. see? Not a whore!
I'm on the bus, watching a girl shush her balloons.
You fucked that MILF against my car!
How would you know?
She scratched her name into my window with her bigass wedding ring. btw she wants you to call her
I called you a cum goblin in my voicemail. I stand by it.
ETSY JUST SENT ME AN EMAIL WITH THE SUBJECT "SUMER ROMANCE" I'M BEYOND FUCKING DONE
I'm hungry, horney and thirsty. Pick two you want to help out with.(please pick horney)
Randomize
