The required reading for this week is a paper about birds called great tits. Let's see my TA keep a straight face through this discussion.
I haven't been "cry when you eat ben and jerrys" high in a while.
do you remember waking up from your blackout, kissing me ever so softly on the stomach, and saying "i love you bro. so much," then passing back out?
I understand that I gave you a nose bleed with a cheeto last night and for that I apologize
bringing a ziploc bag full of Jim Beam to the movies may not have been the best idea.
she gave me a blowjob during our lunchbreak and expected me not to tell people
NEW INFORMATION meech found me passed out on a bench outside.
Let's just not urinate on things that don't need to be urinated on
Just got to her place. Her parents are here and are high as a kite.
Her father just game me a high 5 as they left the room. Her mom leaned in and said "this is a rebound thing"
i projectile vomited shoeless at 7:30 a.m. in a taco bell parking lot. never again.
The only math I use in every day life is figuring out how much I can spend on alcohol and still have money to pay my bills. High school lied to us.
See, I'm just thinking of how...angular my room is. You probably would have sustained brain damage
Don't worry dude, I've created a sex logic bomb to stop that sort of thing.
Eating pizza in the bath tub while watching a romantic comedy alone. I reached a new level of single.
I’ve basically been controlling him with my tits for months now, so I can’t even imagine what would happen if I start banging him
Randomize
