your tears are not going to buy me drinks...
You made a list of reasons why you should be on fear factor. You came up with 2 reasons: "I like fear" and "I am fear"
Acid flashbacks - fact or fiction? Have been seeing a surprising amount of sparkly shit this afternoon...
Its 4 am and he honestly tried throwing pizza at his ceiling for decorations
She's hidden vodka up her skirt and is riding a parking meter. Things can only get better
I will also be strapping forties to the puppies.
well in the interest of full disclosure I have been using a used kfc spork as a buttscratcher for a month
I was like a migrating bird last night. Navigating on pure instinct. Don't remember how... but I made it home.
Just trying to get my dicks in a row.
I try not to have friends with attractive fathers, it only brings my morals down.
I'm about to take my 7th shot and I have to to go to dinner with my grandma in an half hour. What is my life.
Everyone's impressed that I actually got pee all over his car since I'm a girl and they're a little curious..
Does this mean I have to put a bra on now
dude it's 9am and i'm still drunk it's too early for sexting
You're not who I thought you were. You've changed.
WE ARE DOING DRUGS AND GOING TO THE STRIP CLUB SATURDAY LADIES
Randomize
