my desire to fuck abstract ideas (bravery, love, popsicls,,) increases by 8bajillion% when I'm high
So he told me he didn't have a condom, paused, and then said "so, pulling out" and tried to high five me.
I managed to lose everything but my socks.. which stayed on all 6 times we had sex.
She made me be the little spoon then she pretended to be a jet pack for an hour straight
i think she just faxed a picture of her vag from the office copy machine... i mean what kind of sexting is that... wait is that even legal???
I drew a nude short fat middle aged woman today and liked it
It was honestly one of my favorite days in art class except for the 20 min she faced me and kept looking at me and we made eye contact
We are gunna have the best winter break smoking weed and eating ham
Nope. Flying out tonight. Staying with my great aunt who is an ex nun turned hostel owner. Best and likely most dangerous St. Patty's Day to commence in 10 hours. IRELAND!
Be safe. And I hate you.
He offered to buy me free breakfast if I stayed at the hotel overnight with him. I then realized they have a complimentary breakfast.
The guys are trying to figure out my orientation....think theyve settled on "drunksexual"
I've had sex near too many of the blankets to let our parents touch them like this
I felt like I was having sex with Joffrey from Game of Thrones. Needless to say how bad it was
I'm sorry I was just sleeping on the kitchen floor I'm too dead to think
i can't believe i helped you shave your back last night, and she still didn't sleep with you.
Dammit. the window insulation sheets are too small for my windows. Yet again I am disappointed by size
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