i deep throated a ruler to see what my limit was...
i hooked up with a boy reading dear john, i have to get points for that somewhere
no he gets major points for having a girl hookup with him after reading dear john
She's like the pied piper of lesbians.
He cut you off when you said Paula Dean was in your soul...He kicked you out when "Paula" started eating random peoples food
Her tits were the only thing that upgraded her from "no way in fuck" to "drunken mistake"
Well we didn't hook up. Maybe from his girlfriend's point of view, but not mine.
well, the two that sent pics I've already been with, so at least its not just BAM HERE'S MY PENIS IN YOUR INBOX ENJOY THOSE MEGAPIXELS
It's 3:30pm, I've been out of bed for an hour and spent most of that barfing. We're switching to beer next debate.
Apparently the Massachusetts Bay Transit Authority severely looks down on Chinese firedrills on a public bus
Yeah but the people love.
I fell down the stairs while taking the dog out last night. I was laying there with the dog licking me face and my neighbor just stepped over me
He may be 6' 6" but I'm 180 lbs of pure rage and determination
my gynecologist gave me a high 5 for not getting any STD's since my last visit and said "Way to go Annabeth!" you have twenty seconds to get to my level
I'm touching everything in your apartment with my penis.
While buying Plan B the lady at the counter looked at me and said hope you have a successful night as I walked away in shame
We stood outside the room listening to them have sex and making meow noises
That's not right, is it?
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