I think I kinda wanna bone that ginger from Harry Potter.
You literally just made my flesh crawl.
you ran into the room and announced "I JUST FUCKED HER IN THE ASS". apparently you forgot she left the bedroom 5 minutes before you and was standing with us all.
Why did you put hummus in my pillow case?
You hooked up with another girl while you were with me. You were literally holding my hand while you did it.
I had a dream she was puking on me, but sadly in real life she was puking on me too
As a general rule, drunkenness and gymnastics do not mix.
I don't even care that his girlfriend will be there. Us hooking up is a tradition and she will NOT ruin it.
you guys just sat there and simultaneously smoked bowls staring at each other... it was like a bowl off or something.
My night ended with a French cab driver offering me his sperm free of cost.
He posted a picture from Senor Frogs. I don't remember where that bikini came from and my sombrero is PERPENDICULAR. Safe to say it was one hell of a day
Exactly best part of my night he took of his shirt and surprise traveler fanny pack
my whole checking account just had a funeral down bourban street, paid for that, and then bought everyone 5 shots of fireball...
we fucked and then he hand fed me a hot pocket
I got home and found him passed out in my tank top so i think i'll put lipstick on him and mass text a picture to everyone in his phone. that's what he gets for eating all my wheat thins
How many Hail Marys does a girl need to say to get some quality nudes?
Randomize
