i keep myself tagged when other girls look bad/ugly so i look better
I have two girls sleeping in my bed naked and I ended up making it to class, what were you saying about staying in on the weekdays?
I just gave the bartender my number in roman numerals. If she figures it out, she's worth a shot
on a brighter note, the strip club found my atm card
i've met an abundance of virgins and guys who where flip flops, i thinks there's a correlation
cliffnotes. writing studyguide on last pack of smokes. glad this semester is over.
i'm forwarding you the dirty picture of that fat girl that likes me sent . i feel like since youre my best friend you should puke in your mouth too .
YOU CAN'T BASE A RELATIONSHIP OFF A PENIS
I LIKE HIS TONGUE TOO.
Consider it an appointment to improve my blow job capabilities.
Woke up on the stairs at my parents house. Good start to vacation.
One last thing: he lists glow sticks and tacos as things he can't live without. How would we not be friends??
They made up a new version of "Smash or Pass" called "I would(n't) let you sit on my face" to yell at the freshman
I maxed out my credit card last night on powdered donuts and beef jerky
Probably shouldn't be looking at memes at my grandmother's funeral
she's my really slutty friend i bring around so i can act slutty and not feel as bad about it
Randomize
