Eating in charleston sc at a seafood place called "hymans". Like normal I had no problem finding it.
Olympics start in one day, that gives us 24hrs to think of gold medal worthy drinking games
you dipped you banana in queso last night.
I drove 5 hours to see her. She thanked me by getting shitfaced, inviting her boyfriend over, and making me sleep on the couch after I cooked for them and did the dishes. You're right. I'm a fucking doormat.
Charles Darwin would shit his pants if he saw that we managed to survive that weekend.
This guy on the bus keeps leaning over and sniffing my hair.
My vag is like the Sahara
Ew that's gross.
The sad truth. Barren and empty.
the manischevitz sangria was a big hit
My lunch = taste testing salsas for A&P. They gave me a free 64oz grape juice as a thank you. So, now we have something to drink in the house. So while you are spending all the money on breakfast rolls and pizza for lunch, I'm cigaretteless and whoring myself for tablespoons of salsa and free juice.
We're making a scrapbook of dick pics, you want in or what?
i don't care if you are my best friend. does not give you the right to describe how well my sister gives blowjobs.
how about your cousin?
you bounced a quarter off my butt and it came back hitting you in the eye. karma, bitch.
Well I just masturbated while reading a recipe for Alfredo sauce so I guess you could say I’m growing up
FYI - Don’t go in the downstairs bathroom. Ryan is passed out naked on the floor with a raging hard on.
Oh the sweet dreamless sleep of drugs
You? On what? Why?
Randomize