So I just passed a billboard for "Risque Cafe: Good food and topless women". Fuck. I love SC.
That girl would be great looking if she lost 1000 pounds and cut off her head.
Lets get really high and only speak Spanish to each other again tonight
She wanted to test if her costume allows her to still have sex in it. It does
I'm reducing my diet to vodka and rice cakes.
I just got fire extinguished by his roommate while we were having sex. That's just taking cock blocking to a whole new level.
He threw me out a window and then threw raw ground beef at us. Normally you'd hate someone for that, but that guy's great.
You screamed at all of us and then showed us your sack. You're like the boyfriend of my dreams.
the only consolation to the fact that i puked in public today was that i did it down a storm drain... so at least i am a responsible public puker
I know. I told you I'm a mess. She had weird nipples. I almost lost an eye to one.
S.O.S. he's talking about horses and breast feeding.
I only want to come over for sex and blueberry pancakes
Did you leave a mouse under my pillow again?
Just for the record, I did not have sex in your bed. Happy 4th of July.
I think I met my butt stuff soulmate
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