I went to blockbuster, where I always go when I need to soul searching
Despondent, hopeless, I decide on vantage point, because I vaguely resemble matthew fox (let me believe this, please)
It was cheaper to buy then rent, so now I'm stuck w/ a wretched hangover and I own this shit movie
Yep, it's a dick on our front door. Intentional?
cant go down on her man, her vagoo reminds me of a face hugger from aliens
isnt it creepy that our bodies make people
I'm not gonna not go for it, she's foreign and pulled a shotglass out of her thong.
She is banging on the liquor store door begging them to let her come in.
She is high at the bar - she thinks the bottle of frangelico is aunt jemima telling her to stop doing drugs.
just watched my roommates get stoned and jury rig a pulley system to pass the bowl back and forth across the room.
Throwing up so forcefully that toilet water hits you in the face is not what the Pilgrims and Indians had in mind for this holiday
Pretty sure I just puked up sand. And nothing else.
So much easier to puke and rally now that my gluten's under control
we are the apple cider girls!
Also I feel I should tell you last night when I came home I fell into my laundry hamper and woke up in a pile of my clothes
I was giving him a handjob in the woods and a family walked by
I just have to point out that once I typed "fa" my phone filled in "fatass"
It's election day and I was just tied up with an American flag scarf
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