honestly, who buys weed with an unemployment check?
you.
oh yeah. preciate
the family i'm sitting with looks like the Addams family. Except for the daughter...she looks like Shrek
there should be a rule against ugly people hooking up.
yeah...but then what would the ugly people do? hook up with pretty people? yeahhh..don't see that happening in the near future. plus i'm not okay with that.
you alive?
ya, the episode of maury where people are afraid of things are on, i had to keep livin
My cat puked at the same time as me. Makes me feel better about myself, except he can stand and I can't.
Bars not open yet, I feel like a desperate alcoholic wandering around outside.
She looked at me and said "i like penises." and then passed out with her condom balloon animal in her hands.
maybe volvos are so family friendly and safe because they're extremely uncomfortable to get fucked on.
So I was about the only one NOT pregaming or stoned at my aunt's funeral... Maybe thats why I'm the black sheep.
Until she magically finds a brain, I'm going to be a dick. Fair trade. She's a idiot, I'm an ass.
I am trying to take a picture of a man in a wheelchair trying to ship a michael jackson portrait
Let us bow our heads and pray that I don't throw up in the tub
my star wars tattoo got me laid last night. definitely a dark side sort of benefit im thinking
just like fucking own it. stare that cop in the eye and just keep masturbating "yeah motherfucker Im high as shit and this feels great"
HOLY SHIT HOLY SHIT HOLY SHIT HOLY SHIT
So I just ran in to the Couger you saw me take home last month who i haven't talked to since then at Wawa and she was PISSED.. APPARENTLY i fucked her niece last week
Randomize
