yeah she was being a bitch. do you remember me stealing ryan cabrerra's beer?!?!
I've heard so many rumors about me being taken home in an ambulance I'm starting to believe them.
Dont forget about the tuna sandwich behind your TV
I'm just sayin' man be careful, that chick has castration written all over her.
I will give you 100$, a blow job a day for a month and I will shave my legs according to societal standards until next November if you come recuse me from my night class right NOW.
you're usually drunk when you offer. there's one time you called me, told me not to dye my hair red, and asked if i wanted to see your tits.
Until they make a bed that bathes you in your sleep, I will not be satisfied.
My vag hurts but I feel vindicated
That is an interesting emotion combo
So I had sex in the woods today. Anything else that happened today? Irrelevant. It was a GOOD day.
I know how vodka works Grace. I'm drunk, not stupid.
There's so much mac and cheese stuck to my foot right now
I woke up in your kitchen with my ID in my hand and my nails were painted electric blue. Dude.... never let me have fireball again.
Still, being medically ordered to stuff things in your vagina is amazing.
How did i spend $200 last night?
Every time you went to get me a drink, you also came back with shots. Then you fell down the steps.
New drinking game get out your high school year book and take a shot for everyone in your class who's had a baby!
Randomize
