I am full of burrito and curiosity
Life after highschool has not been kind to her. She looked fatter than Luke Wilson's face in those AT&T commercials.
you will always have a special place in my vag
You have plans tonight?
Stress crying into a bottle of long island ice tea mix...other than that nope
The acoustics in my bra are fantastic.
I'm going as either a recovering alcoholic, or as a guy who came to the party straight from work. Too literal?
I would pay to watch a Bravo special of you getting Botox.
we played animal sounds and i linked arms with her cuz we were both cats....fate and my community college drama teacher have chosen my one night stand
The fact I have to evaluate my choice between tequila and fruity pebbles is a clear image of my life right now
ELLEHCIM
NYRMAK
DRAHCIR
WHAT??
I just realized that this is the first time I've ever seen your mom without sucking your cock.
His dick has the same name as my pipe. I'm keeping him forever.
scotch tastings during the week is a baaad idea. i woke up w no pants but wearing my winter coat
Do you think Ashley had her twin sister tag in for our date? The sex was different and I think a mole was missing
we went to the skate park then back to her house for dinner, and somehow that ended with her making me blueberry pancakes at 2am
Randomize
