no memory loss, but i'm unhappy with my memories
I'll have to explain it to you tonight when i call drunk. It will sound better
Is it bad that I see a party full of girls I know he has fucked as a challenge for me to be the one who ends up in his bed?
We made a water bong out of a wine bottle... Being an architect major finally payed off.
How was your 8:30 class today?
Non existent. I just threw up in my water bottle on the bus.
He asked her to marry him and she said yes. There is NO WAY she knows about his penchant for wearing lingerie.
Both of our knuckles were split open this morning when I came out of the blackout, the column on the porch has two new cracks in it, were like the redneck Super Smash Bros.
Why did you not tell me that video snapchats are a thing? This is a fucking game changer for my mobile sex life.
I just realized now that you're pregnant we can't use alcohol as currency
Everything is bullshit and I hate everyone
just walked passed a black light...apparently he DID cum.
So I have now fucked both my roommates...This is why I can’t live with men.
She started crying, nearly punched a guy, started smoking multiple cigarets backwards and broke the slide on her bong. Why do I always end up babysitting the crazy ones?
Your participation in the democratic process makes me horny AF
Ok so I need a recap of last night...
YOU SPENT SIX DOLLARS AT NICKEL BEER NIGHT!!! How's that
Randomize
