if i had a camp nickname it would be Flick Bean
Is it sad that when she told me he has a small peen I felt like it made us more compatible?
they told me they were banning four lokos so yeah i did have to buy 42 of them
Just did my hair and make up at mcdonalds so we're in the same boat.
Care to explain why there is sushi in the soap dish in the bathroom
At least I'm doing lines with a notecard. That counts for something right
So my nipple piercings were only $20 because it's breast cancer awareness month. Fuck yes!
So did you grab that log full of poison ivy for the fire and then apparently take a piss on Saturday night too or was that just me?
will we ever learn or are we destined for a life of poison ivy covered balls?
dude he's still passed out in my bathtub. and his dick is half way in a 40 bottle... i really hope he was just trying to piss in it
Woke up with chlamydia and a bruised rib. I'd say my boss is gonna be mad about me not showing up to work, except you know.. it's her fault.
I bought emergency contraception until I / we decide how to handle that. And target gave me a gift receipt for it. Awkward.
Well there's a microwave in my yard now too. I fucking Bruce/Caitlyn Jennered decathloned that bitch.
This was the first funeral I've ever attended where I had to pee behind a bush cuz someone was passed-out drunk in the locked bathroom. Steve would have been proud.
Someone wrote "LazerSwords" on my cock last night. My erect cock. Tequila is no one's friend.
Congrats, you are the first person our bartender ever met that actually needed wheeled out of a bar in a wheelchair. He said you were his hero.
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