Ps what kind of horrible ppl are we that we both checked blackberries during sex and neither minded?
I went to the bathroom like 8 times and each time I looked in the mirror and tried saying "I am sober." I burst out laughing when I got to "so-" every time. If you can't convince yourself, you can't convince anyone else. Fuck it, I'm going upstairs and drinking more.
You make your fellow Jews happy.
It's been decided..lingerie is an investment. You get free breakfast and cab rides out of it.
Strip club for my birthday. And none of this discrimination shit. We're going to a guys one and girls one. Go get your singles.
I told him I'd go cook him breakfast, but ended up passing out on the kitchen floor in the fetal position spooning the dog
Well after last night I am convinced he is real life Tyler Durden. He only exists to me and somehow keeps me out of jail this entire time
I remember seeing his penis I just dont know exactly what I did with it
you were telling us about the time you had sex in an alley and he stopped, looked up and said 'it was a cul-de-sac' and went right back to what he was doing.
Hit a new low. I'm FB stalking him while he is lying in bed sleeping naked next to me. He fell asleep with FB still open and unlocked on his iPad.
I can't! Its just like the night that I bathed you, I didn't tell anyone.
he looked at me and said 'happiness is a warm blanket' then stole my vodka.
I shaved my asshole for you. You WILL fuck me tonight.
The shitshow that was last night is the gift that just keeps on giving
we went outside for a smoke and when we came back in you were ptfo on the floor holding the phone to your ear. Pizza pizza was on the line.
I was so high last night that at one point I kept licking his neck saying he tasted like soap and truffles.
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