id be glad to
i have a reoccuring irrational fear i'm going to walk in on my dad masterbating. Night.
so we have officially lost him as of 7 hours ago.. already called campus security, the drunk tank and the hospital. figure he'll turn up eventually..
i'll start checking the bushes on campus.
no where in the syllabus does it say "no alcoholic beverages allowed".
finally cleaned my dorm for the first time all year. bleach is awesome.
I'm crawling around naked in my room looking for my hairbrush. Just thought I'd put that image in your head.
Its only fair we share our golden vaginas with the world. It would be selfish if we didn't.
I know. My only sports are biking to buy drugs and running from the police.
YOU ARE OBSESSED WITH PORCHES. I AM OBSESSED WITH PORCHES. HOW IS THIS REAL.
He has pizza coupons and a hammer next to his toilet.
I want to break his glasses with my pelvis.
I'd rather be castrated by angry chipmunks Than live your life for 24 hours
I never knew it was coming. He was cute and nerdy, cute and nerdy, cute and nerdy, and then BAM! Best hookup ever.
He tried to eat me out...through my pants.
Our Uber driver pulled over to show us Tinder some dick pics. Top that.
Randomize
