Greg found me on xtube. Who knew random hook ups would leave their web cams on and upload it. At least it shows off big penis.
btw.sex in the wood isnt as romantic as it seems.heels kept sinking in the dirt and pine needles were sticking to the fishnets
i wish i had your life
I was like, "um, that's my butthole."
Pls don't use the words alligator, purple, and sperm in the same sentence ever again.
apparently it's a turnoff if you ask a guy why he thinks he needs to use magnums
Being with her was like shitty sexual fear factor big ass sausage nipples over sized outty belly button i was scared and drunk tell know one
i tied my phone to a string attached to my bra. i am NOT losing it tonight
He said he wanted to start giving out "sex souvenirs". I got a poster with a penguin on it.
The last time I went to Vegas and the sun started to rise, my copilot went home with her nipples pierced.
Pretty good. They took the stitches out but it still hurts like a bitch. The doctor says I should be off crutches by next week.
Well, that's good. Let's hope drunk you doesn't sabotage you.
I feel like a bottle of fireball rented a bull dozer and ran me over until I was left without a shred of my dignity
If I stopped drinking I'd have to take up murdering.
Only thing I have going for me is jacking off, weed, and saturdays
you were shouting "me peeing on him is the closest he'll EVER get to my vagina!"
I have decided that I would still fuck Harrison Ford even though he is old as fuck now. Do you think it would kill him?
Most likely. But I bet he'd do a bang up job of it before he died.
He absolutely would.
Randomize
