I hate you but I'm not in hate with you
I found the pot of gold last night, and it was full of bad decisions.
she refuses to pay for the plan b and so do i. it's the most dangerous game of chicken i've ever been involved in. but i have my pride.
Youre on making sure I dont black out around fat chicks duty
Upperdeckered the toilet. Took sombrero off, drawing too much heat. Witnessed glassing. In bush, come findme.
so according the 72 facebook statuses i put up last night that i don't recall, i would say it was a success. how about you?
In local news, attempts to hide phone from extremely drunk self prove unsuccessful for Dallas woman.
Mimosa dick, like his cousin Whiskey dick, is just as ineffective but a lot more fun to be around
His penis looked like how I would imagine Satan's pinky finger.
Just wanted to share my unfortunate vagina news in the hopes that it would make your vagina feel better about itself.
why is there a shopping cart in my back seat? and a dick drawn on the side of my car?
That was my first party and they were so suprised that this little freshman girl was a FUCKING BEER PONG QUEEN.
He has a syndrome called asshole. And it flares up 24/7.
Anytime you wish.we are doing double shots in the kitchen,and I drank a beer in the shower,so...the sooner you get here,the sooner you can get on our level.
My younger brother asked me "to stop fucking his girlfriends older sisters"
Randomize
